Aaaargh!

I have spent about six hours working on one image. I've shot and re-shot. I was up until 6am working on it. I am so close. I've been SO CLOSE ten times already. I'm getting very frustrated. Wimper.

~the lady love

I'm Straddling the Fence of the Law

So I got a letter from the IRS today that states legal action is pending against me. Apparently they didn't receive my 1st quarter 2005 estimated tax filing, which has happened before, so I guess they're trying to make a point that I can't fuck around with them. I guess I could go to jail? I don't really know what happened here, but I'm not too terribly worried since I will easily be able to clear this up. However, a stint in the pokey might not be so bad... I could take a break from life and make somebody my bitch.

On a more positive note, I met these guys a couple of weeks ago who saw some of my photography. Word has spread since then, and apparently, it has spread to some big time gallery owner in Atlanta who now wants to meet me. Supposedly this guy is known for showing some high profile artists. I'm not getting too excited over this news yet. I mean, the man just wants to meet me, and to be honest, I think I am a pretty good photographer, but I definitely don't think I am great by any means.

But, here's my latest installment of a series I am working on inspired by the lyrics of the great Myshkin, which I actually DO think is pretty great:

Now a black mood is upon me
I'll sit in mourning awhile
For the truth comes and goes
Like a traveling show
But the blame sleeps with me every night

~ Lyrics by Myshkin from the song "Rosebud Bullets" from the record "Rosebud Bullets" / Photo by the lady love



It will be interesting to see how things unfold.

~the lady love

I Am My Own Worst Enemy, Sometimes

One thing I know about myself for sure: too much sleep depresses the hell out of me. So what did I do today? I slept. ALL DAY. I finally got up around 8pm to find myself in a hollow of despair, but I did it to myself. I was supposed to go to visit my parents today, and I spent all day calling between sleep cycles to say, "I'll be there later" until finally at eight I called and said, "I'll be there tomorrow." So, they're pissed at me, too, feeling like I am blowing them off because I haven't seen them in two months since they came to Atlanta to celebrate my 30th birthday. My own guilt about this little fact is not helping my mindset, though I am not blowing them off; I love them. This despressive state is just a cycle that continuously feeds itself.

I will force it shortlived.

I'll start anew tomorrow, crawl out of this hole, and try not to get more than 6 hours of sleep a night to keep my mind healthy.

~the lady love